Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Marriage and kids.

Marriage... It's a wonderful thing, and I love my amazing wife so very much. But there is one question that has come up more than a few times. Kids. Back when we first got engaged, there were people that started asking if my (then) fiance was pregnant. Then friends and family started having kids. Then the question became, "Are you guys going to start having kids so our kids can play?" Now, after nearly three years, nearly every time I see or speak to the family I don't see that often ask when we're going to start having kids. Get married, and it's all kids, kids, kids. If my wife and I wanted kids right away, why wait to get married? What is it about marriage that makes people act like it's a vehicle for creating children? When I married my wife, it was for love and commitment. Why is it that some people seem confused by the fact that we did not get married in order to have children? If a couple wants to have loads of kids, that's great... have at it. But my wife and I shouldn't be expected to become parents as well. We got married, we're in love, and we're still relatively young. So for the time being we've decided to hold off on having kids in order to enjoy this time while we can. Will we eventually decide to have kids? Maybe, but who knows what the future may hold. But the question still remains, as to why children seem to be an expected part of marriage. The purpose of marriage is not to breed and have as many kids as possible. Marriage is about love. If to you, love includes starting a family, that's fine. But please don't expect us to conform to your idea of what marriage should be. Right now, it's about loving one another. And for us, that's great.

-BH

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